Woods drops teen girlfriend

James Woods has dumped his foolish 20-year-old girlfriend, Ashley Madison. Woods' brother Michael died unexpectedly of a heart attack last month- and he was shocked by Ashley's "insensitivity" during the funeral.

James' friend Scott Sandler told the NY Daily News that Madison showed up for the service dressed "in a 3-inch miniskirt and chain-smoking." Nice.

He said, "At the funeral she was concerned about the amount of magazines she was in. Jimmy was on his knees with tears staining his shirt, and she was showing pictures of herself. Jimmy was so overcome by grief his blood pressure went through the roof early last week, and he had to go to the hospital. When he came out, it was like he had seen the light."

Woods has known the pathetic girl since she was five years old. Ewwww. Adds Sandler, "She's the anti-Christ. She truly has the soul of a moth and the brain of a dead trout." Hey oh!!